I am a big believer in forgiveness. I was raised in the church and on the basis that forgiveness is a Christ-like quality. After all, it is by HIS grace that we are saved. So why is it SO hard?
Flashback to my last semester in college... I ended up having to take a Group Exercise class in order to receive 1 extra credit that had previously been overlooked. I remember thinking, "If nothing else, surely I will get in shape! Have you SEEN Ms. Gilstrap?!" She was the most toned woman I had ever met. So, anyway, I pictured myself doing a little yoga, some aerobics, a bit of weight-training and BAM, I'd have my credit. What I least expected, though, was to walk away from that class with a lifelong lesson.
Ms. Gilstrap had us watch what are called Nooma videos before each class. They are 10-minute videos made by Rob Bell (best-selling author, Christian speaker, and the founding pastor of Mars Hill Bible Church) that teach life-related lessons. While they are all incredible videos, the one that stuck with me most was called "Luggage." The gist of the lesson was that our inability to forgive only affects and hurts us. We carry the bitterness within us as our baggage and it eventually wears us down. The beauty of being able to forgive is that it frees us. It allows us to just let our anger go. So, again... Why is it SO hard?
I also believe strongly that a leopard NEVER changes its spots. I have always wanted to see the best in people, which is both a blessing and a curse. However, there are simply those people that will let you down time and again, people that are deceitful and careless of your feelings and well-being. I have found this out the hard way. So, because they choose to be "leopards," are they equally as worthy of forgiveness as those who unknowingly wrong us? I think so... I really do. This is something easier said than done though.
I have been battling with forgiving a person who really wronged me a while back. This person is fully aware of what they did, but I honestly believe they could care less. Because of that, I know the burdens I carry do not affect them... Only me. So I'm trying... In all my glory and humility, I'm trying.
Now, forgetting it... That's a whole other story for another day.
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1 day ago
This is Lauren Ammerman....Ran across your blog off of Ryan Abbott's...I ABSOLUTELY LOVE reading it!!! You are an amazing writer!!!
ReplyDeleteP.S. Good luck with the upcoming year!!! You will do GREAT!!
Ally, I think you're completely right. It's so easy to forgive someone who is contrite. It's much harder to find the will to bestow my forgiveness upon someone who won't even appreciate or recognize it.
ReplyDeleteBut, honestly, I think that forgiving the "leopards" and those who are undeserving of forgiveness is one of the most liberating feelings. Perhaps because, in that way, we're a reflection of what Jesus did for us on the cross when He died and forgave the very worst of sinners.